Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Biopsy Results

Okay, so I was supposed to get my results on Monday. I called enough times that I think the office assistant wanted to throw me a bone to keep me quiet. He said that he couldn't give me an official diagnosis because the doctor hadn't signed off on the report yet. He did say though from what he was looking at, it was looking benign (non cancerous). I had a feeling that there was something else, but didn't know if it was nerves or what. So we were happy, but cautious. Well, today the doctor called with her findings. I have 2 nodules on my thyroid. The larger one that has caused some of my problems came back benign. The smaller one came back as suspicious for papillary thyroid cancer. So, at this point they have to go forward as if it is cancer. I will have to have surgery to remove the lump. At that time, they will be able to tell if it is for sure cancer or not. Any and all treatment for papillary cancer comes post op anyways, so we will deal with that after surgery. At this point, I don't have the surgery date. I will post as soon as I know. It should however be the first or second week of October.
I feel very blessed to have some answers. I have been seeking answers to my health issues for about a year now. The doctors keep telling me that nothing is wrong, that I just need to lose weight. That was pretty depressing, because the harder I tried, the more weight I put on. While I am not excited to have cancer, I am excited to know that I'm not as mental as I thought I was!!! I am going into this with a positive attitude. I am glad that I now have some answers and a next step to take to becoming healthy. I am surrounded physically and in spirit by some of the best people in the world. I know that all will be okay. I am amazingly more at peace as I'm writing this than I have been in months. Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and prayers. I will keep you posted. Until next time,
T

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Okay, biopsy is done. It was totally awful, and I hope I never have to do that again. Afterwards, I reviewed all of my bloodwork with the doctor. The good news is that I am pretty healthy. All of my hormone levels, including thyroid, came back normal. My cholesterol is still high, but lower than it was. The doctor said we need to wait for the results of the biopsy, which should be in about a week. Then, we can go from there. I was glad that there is nothing really wrong with me, but at the same time, it would have been nice to get some answers. I am a little bruised and swollen, but doing good. I have been able to cook, clean and even do some canning the last couple of weeks. I am starting to feel better generally, but try to listen to my body when it tells me that I need to rest. Thanks for all the prayers in my behalf. I can really tell that there is a higher power at work protecting our family.
Jed is still in NYC, and we are not sure when he will be home. It keeps changing, so it's hard to tell. It could be anytime in the next couple of weeks. If the results of my biopsy are bad news, he will come home immediately.
The kids are still doing good. Life at our house during the school year is rather boring. It doesn't change much. I am glad that the kids are dedicated to their studies though. It really eases my mind. I want them to get the best education that they can.
My Aunt Bernice and Uncle Jerry have been to Arizona to visit with their own children and grandchildren. It has been nice to visit with them some and talk on the phone and through email when they are here. It's nice to keep in touch with extended family, and to feel their love for us as well. Thanks to you Bernice for going out of your way to include me. It means a lot.
I just want to say that I am very grateful for my ward. They are constantly checking on us and making sure we are okay. I am glad to know that all the help I need is just a phone call away. I know that everything is going to be okay, and that I have the support I need even when Jed is away. Thanks everyone for all you do.
As far as the comments go from last time: @ Merideth, I know you have been crazy busy. No worries. But I would love to go to the bread store when you get around to it. @ Melissa, One of the things I miss most about Utah is my chiropractor. I loved going to him. He works from a natural point of view which I loved. I haven't found one here yet that I like. I have had blessings, and if the time comes that I do need surgery and treatment on my thyroid, I would love to do a family fast, if only to ease my nerves!!! Thanks for thinking of me, and keeping me in your prayers. Love ya.
Until next time, probably next Monday or Tuesday after I get my biopsy results,
T

Thursday, September 2, 2010

September 2, 2010

Jed is still working in New York. A couple weeks ago, they flew me out to see him instead of flying him home for the weekend. It was nice to have a break. We went to the statue of Liberty and to Ellis island. We did a lot of walking. I took a taxi and the subway for the first time in my life. We went to Times square and Central park. I was only there 2 1/2 days, so we did as much as we could. I was so tired when I got home, but it was well worth it. Thanks Mitch for watching kids so I could go. Thanks Larry for making it all happen. Thanks Chris for the hotel when I got delayed in Charlotte. And thanks Teena for the great rate on a hotel at Times Square.

After this weekend, Jed has a follow up appointment with his doctor, and then goes back to New York for a week or two. After that, he is supposed to be working out of the office on a regular basis. We are hoping this holds true, but know better than to expect it until we see it. As for his shoulder, it's okay. It will take a while to be back to normal, but at least he can use it. It gets sore and achy, but with time and exercise, it will get better.

The kids have been in school for over a month now. They are really looking forward to the long weekend. Alyson is starting to get literature in the mail from colleges, and it's exciting for her. Kind of bittersweet for me. I am so proud of her determination to get a great education. But, I will miss her when she's gone off to school. Tyson is loving being in High School. He is doing so well, and keeping his grades up. He is taking an agriculture class which puts him into FFA. He is really enjoying that, and loves the days they go work at the farm. I am glad that he has found something that he really enjoys. He says he can't wait to be able to drive the tractor. Alexys and Hannah keep busy with school and are both very dedicated to getting their work done and being good friends. They are great examples to their classmates. Both of their teachers have sent home letters telling how much they appreciate them in class.

After my last appointment with the Endocrinologist, the one who wanted all the tests again, I wasn't very happy. I didn't think he should be starting over again. I wanted to see progress in my condition. I didn't know if it was me, or if it was him, but I wasn't getting a very good feeling overall about my visit. So, after consulting with my Primary Care Physician and my insurance company, I decided to see a different doctor. So I had my first visit last week with the new endocrinologist. I was much happier with this one. I felt like I was being heard, and not just another person. The doctor actually took the time to describe in detail the test results from my previous testing. She then said that I had to have a biopsy, because at this point they have to rule out cancer. Then they can go from there. She said there was no point in doing the testing again, because it wouldn't change what they already found. So, they took 10 vials of blood to run a bunch of tests to check a bunch of stuff. She ordered a bone density scan and a biopsy. I go in for both of these on September 13. I have done research on the biopsy, and to be honest, it scares me to death. I compared it to childbirth to a friend. I said you hope for the best, but expect the worst. Then if it's not the worst, you'll be okay. I try to stay informed, but maybe this time I should have gone in blindly. I get anxiety just thinking about it. I have a lot of emotions when I think about my health right now. I am glad to find out why I don't feel well, but scared as well. I hope I'm ready for all the changes that will happen, but not sure if I am. I am a self described control freak. Maybe I really need this lesson in my life. I am a fixer. I take care of others. I love being a mom and wife, and I am afraid of letting people down if I can't do it all. It's incredibly hard for me to ask for help, and I am very nervous about all of this. If it is cancer, there's a lot of help I will need through treatment. If it's not cancer, I will still need help as I continue to find out why I'm always sick, and as I get better.

So sorry to ramble on, but I really need it. I find a sense of healing after I can get it all out. At the same time, it makes it more real to me. That is why sometimes I ignore posting an update until my friends remind me that I need to.

Anyway, thank you all for your love and support. Thanks for caring about us enough to keep up with us. Hugs and kisses to all of you from all of us. Until next time, probably after biopsy,
T